My Blog

8/3/2026

I cleaned like my entire house today lmao. On a more interesting note, however, I am thinking about modding my DS lite that I've had since I was a kid. I discovered that I'd need a flash cart and a micro sd card, which would cost me around $30, but after that, I could download any ROM I can get my hands on and play whatever on my DS. I still have all of my old games, so I could just play those, but idk I like to add complicated bullshit to my ideas. Why just play the games you have when you could learn a whole new subject and buy new equipment? Anywho I want to try the guitar hero games on DS and some others. I even foudn a Batman The Brave And The Bold ROM, which honestly really surprised me. I guess it came out around that time, but it got me really excited. They also had a Sea Monsters game, which feautures a mosasaur in some way, shape, or form, and if you know me, you know I love a mosasaur.

7/25/2026

I woke up at 3:00am, and I haven't been back to bed since (writing this at 7:45am). I plan on sewing some on my machine today, so that should be fun. I'm going to make a little marble (or in my case bead) maze that I can carry around and fidget with. I think it would be fun to have. I love mazes, and I love sewing. This should be right up my alley. It also means the maze is reusable, so I don't have to get an app or a maze book or google random mazes online. IDK. I thought it'd be neat. I also might make Smiley a little pajama set with that pineapple fabric I have. It'll be a short sleeve button up and a pair of shorts.

I am also debating a transformers purchase. I am deciding between the transformers to the right. There's Core Class Soundwave, Studio Series Transformers the Movie Wheeljack, and the Blokees Defenders Series 03.

The Soundwave is a 3.75" that costs $33, and he's an actual transformer. My Yolopark Mini Soundwave has gotten really loose in the hip joints and struggles to stand up, so I was thinking about replacing him. I just feel weird replacing him? IDK. I'm like I already have a Soundwave. I don't need another one.

Wheeljack is a 6" figure that costs $27, and he is also an actual transformer. I do not have a Wheeljack in my collection, so I feel like that gives him a little more priority, but I don't really know. I like his character because hes spunky, chaotic, innovative, and an engineer. His design also reminds me of the Mexican flag, and that makes me laugh. I have seene edits of him with sombreros on lmao.

Finally, the defenders series would get me 12 figures, costing me $36, but each one is maybe 2" tall and do not transform. I think they're cute as hell, but I hesitate because of their size and non-transforming style. It would, however, get me a new Soundwave and a bunch of new characters for my collection.

I think I am leaning towards the Soundwave or Wheeljack. I think the defenders may be too tiny for carrying around. I'd be afraid they'd break or something in my pocket. Plus, the transformers are a little more durable I'd think because the defenders are more like collector's items whereas the transformers, while still collector's items, are more made for play and being used. I just like the little Mix Master. He's so lil. Now to decide whether I'm getting Wheeljack or Soundwave. Wheeljack is cheaper, newer (price is more variable), and bigger, and I already have a Soundwave. I just want a Soundwave that has a hinged chest compartment and a little cassette. I just think it's cute. On the other hand, I could always get the Soundwave later. His price is less variable, and I've been looking at him for like years, and his price has stayed relatively stable. Wheeljack is probably the better choice. I can get Soundwave for my Fall Semester Bingo reward. Plus, it's not like my Yolopark Soundwave is ruined. He can still sit with me and chill. He just can't stand very well.

7/24/2026

It's like midnight as I write this, so technically it's 7/24 but it's emotionally 7/23. I have styaed up too late, and I am about to go insane. I want to go to bed, but my brain is screaming at me every time I think about going to bed. I am very stimmy for some reason. I've got fidgets, a comfy hoodie, a stuffed animal, and stimmy music, but my brain isn't satisfied. I really should just sleep. I just don't want it to be tomorrow. I don't know what to do with my time awake either. I don't actually feel like doing anything. That's why I'm just writing on the blog. Not even my actual journal lmao. This is faster than hand writing things. I may not be the fastest typist, but at least I don't chicken peck. What the fuck am I doing? I just caught myself in a reflection and I look like a goddamn hacker stock image. Im wearing a big ass hoodie with the hood up, and I'm typing on a computer. I mean, it is a Buccee's hoodie, so there is that. I may not be the ideal hacker stock image right now. Maybe I should try writing. Maybe that would help. Maybe I brainstorm other ideas for writing shorter stories so I don't jump into a long ass project that ends up intimidating me. What else do I want my goobers to do? (goobers to the left)

In the one I'm currently writing, they're just meeting for the first time, and I like that. It's just that I always write myself into a long ass project because I over-explain, so I don't know how to make it a shorter project unless I just want a shit-ton of questions unanswered or keep those answers somewhere else. I could have a page for my- oh wait. I do. I just never fucking update that mf. Oopsie. I might actually go work on that. Bye bye.

7/18/2026

I forgot to blog again lmao. I ended up getting a blind box bjd off of AliExpress. It's the Observation Object design from the Zack Event series. I dont really plan on getting another one, so I don't mind him keeping the name Zack. I think it suits him. I've also been making him some clothes. So far it's just a few tops and some shorts, but I like them thus far. I've been making the patterns after taking his measurements. This is my first time really trying to make clothes patterns, but they've been fitting him rather well. I wanted a male doll because I know a lot about feminine fashion, but I wanted to experiemnt with male fashion. Right now he's in a turtleneck tank and some black baggy cargo shorts.

I really like the way the doll feels in my hand and how much articulation he has. He sits in a little tupperware container I set aside for him. I need to make him a little cushion to lay on. I feel bad. He just lays on his clothes and alternate hands. Maybe I should have one container for his stuff and one for his clothes and stuff. Is that a waste of space? Is that too much room dedicated to a doll? He's my little buddy; I don't want him to be uncomfortable. I also want to design more outfits for him that are more themed. He has his mental institution fit that he came with, and thus far I've just been making him random staple pieces, but I'd like to get more funky with it. That would also require me, however, to make funkier patterns. I guess it would be a nice challenge. Maybe I make a little section on my website for doll clothes and patterns. Ooooh, I could make a little catwalk collage of him. Oh wait I was going to make him little headphones. I found an easy way to do it. I looked it up on Youtube and found some good ideas, like using the little plastic seal at the lid of a bottle. I used an apple juice bottle because the lid was wider. He has a slightly larger or wider head than your avergae Barbie, and I tested it. It fits rather well.

I have also been making clothes for my old Build a Bear, Smiley. I've decided he's trans, like me. So far he has a t-shirt and a button down. I also plan on making him an essa high vis vest like those vests people give their essas (If you don't know, that's Emotional Support Stuffed Animal). Most people that I see online, though, have a dog or other quadrupedal stuffed animal, so they tend to buy dog vests. I, on the other hand, have a bipedal bear. This means I have to get a different type of vest because the dog ones obviously wouldn't fit. I also have been making patterns for Smiley. Actually the way I learned to make basic shirt and pant patterns was from Lixie Pig Crafts on Youtube. They have a few videos about making your own patterns, and after watching those, I just started making shit up.

4/24/2026

So it has been a hot minutes since I've done one of these. As you can see I have updated the site since then, but I have not been blogging. Studio is over for the semester mostly (thank god), so now I just have a few finals to worry about. Thinking about making a page for my model kits and action figures that I collect. I guess we'll see if that ends up happening. I'm also trying to debate what my end of year gift ot myself shall be. I think I'm going to get a xenomorph action figure, but I have a few more options that are also tempting.

5/8/2025

I am finally out for the summer, and I've been trying to fill my time so that I do not give in to the dread. I've been doing perler beads, drawing, watching Gundam, making minecraft skins, playing minecraft, and playing with my cat. So far I have managed not to go insane, but we shall see. Today I went to Joann's to buy some fabric since they are going out of business, and I got some nice fleece. I am planning on trying to make V1 and V2 plushies. If I am going to pay $30 for a plushie, I want it to be color patched, not printed, so I decided I would make my own. I can't remember if I can use a machine on fleece, but I guess I'll find out. I have an old sketch somewhere of me trying to figure out how to make it, but that might be lost to the void. It might be in my current sketchbook? I am not sure. I also want to ask my mom to buy me some gundams so that I can put them together, but I am unsure how to ask. I could just put them in the cart for her to see, but I do already have them saved for later. She might not have seen them in there? I also don't know how many to put in there. I'm thinking like 3 max. That and the nippers. I'd need those to actually put them together. I think I might just put them in the cart and see what she says. I have also decided I really like the character of Andrew Waltfeld. (SPOILER) I spoiled myself and figured out that he survived the fight with the Strike while watching a review of the LaGOWE HG model, which I am interested in buying. Apparently he only lost an eye and an arm and comes back later. I saw some images of him in a ship with LaCus with the scar, so he comes back in a plot relevant way. I'm pretty excited to see him again. He was a good mix of funny yet a good source of conflict for Kira. By humanizing him, it created a conflict for Kira to cope with the fact that he "killed" another man. Plus him and Cagali yelling at each other over kebabs was pretty great. Okay I moved them into the cart. I only put two and the nippers, and I figure she'll ask if she thinks it's too much or if she wants me to put more. I would get the HG Gouf, but I don't like the colors. He isn't blue enough. I am worried that I'll do a shit job of the LaGOWE, but I am going to do the entry grade RX-78 first. Maybe I'll get the hang of it by then. Also, I am pretty sure the instructions are in Japanese, so we shall see how that goes. There are pictures and everyone else has mamanged to put them together, so I should be fine. I really hope I don't mess up the LaGOWE. I kinda really like the fucked up cat. He's just a little guy. I am planning on posing them with my Soundwave and putting pictures up on pinterest and stuff. I think that would be fun.

4/27/2025

Spent today trying to study. I continue to struggle to find energy to do the stuying I should be doing. I did however, buy a game I am weirdly obsessed with on Steam. It went on sale for $7, so I decided I might as well own a copy for my computer as well as my switch. It's Where Angels Cry. I even have a little character that I designed for the main character when he was still faceless in the first game. He has the outfit for the second game but whatever. You play as an investigator for the Church and look into a miracle of a statue crying tears of blood. You figure out that the new prior of the monastary is acting suspiciously and have to figure out what he's up to. I managed to beat it in two hours this time and got an achievement for it, so that's fun. I unlocked like 80% of the achievements on my first run. It's a dumb little point and click puzzle game, but I like it. I made a blinky for it a while back, too. It just sort of lives in the back of my brain and rears its head every once in a while. I played it as a kid when my mom would keep me busy with little puzzle games and it has just had its place in my mind since. I'm using it to avoid the dread. I played the second game a few years back and designed the character then before I finished the game. Then at the very end, you can see his face, and he's just a basic white man model. I made him a little ethnic in mine but whatever. Decided after a while I was gonna call him Isaias because I can't just call him my Where Angels Cry OC. He's wearing the knights templar uniform, but in the first game he's just wearing monk robes. I have some doodles of him in those but I mainly draw him in the templar armor. What can I say? It's more fun to draw. I should probably draw him in the robes more, though. In the second game they decided to animate the characters while they talked, but it ended up just looking weird. It is funny to see him chucking a bee hive at some guy though. (It was the antagonist, dont worry.) I love the little things he says when you click on irrelevant or wrong objects. "I don't think that'll work.""The cow looks happy.""That dog takes his job very seriously." I just find it funny. Very generic but eh. I might draw him some later tonight. Get my hand used to him again.

4/26/2025

Today I packed up studio and moved all that shit outta there. It was kind of nice to get it all out and know I don't have to worry about it anymore. I manged to pack that and a few of my dorm things up and get those back home before doing literal nothing for the rest of the day. I did go to a slime making event and got a few free fidgets, so that's always fun. My hands are stained green now, though. I made so much slime that I couldn't fit it in the cups or containers they had, so I brought it back to my dorm and stuffed it into a ziploc bag I had. I'm debating watching some more Gundam tonight or if I should do something else. All day I've struggled with getting myself to do things, including watching my show. Last I watched Cagali had been revealed to be a princess of the Orb or whatever. I need to study for my finals, but I haven't managed to do that either. Maybe my depression is kicking in. Who knows? Not super thrilled to have to live with my transphobic mother again here in about a week. Guess I'm going to be living on discord VCs and trying ignore the constant deadnaming and misgendering. God ot annoys me so much, but bringing it up would only start more shit. God I can barely stand to look at her face now. Hopefully I get some sort of counselling or therapy set up over the summer.

4/25/2025

Finally finished with final review. That was hectic as hell and had many not sleeping, but all I have to worry about now is finals and portfolio preview. I've been spending my spare time getting into Gundam, and that's been pretty fun. Tried to watch the UC, but I have to get crunchyroll to watch ZZ and Zeta. Accidentally watched Char's Counterattack without watching those two. Whoops. Quess was annoying as fuck though. Her stupid lopsided pig tails just bothered me the whole time she was on screen.

They put it in a braid for one scene but then put it right back to that awful hairstyle. Does she have to part it precisely every time she does her hair? Who knows? I figure I'll get a crunchyroll subscription over the summer and am watching Gundam Seed right now. Absolutely devastating that my favorite character's name is Mu. Like Moo. Like a cow. Devastating. Mu La Flaga the man that you are. He's honestly the most chill person there. That and he's just a basic ass blond white man.

Accidentally spoiled myself online (I AM GOING TO SPOIL IT HERE) and saw that he apparently ends up with the captain. I think they're pretty cute, but apprently something weird happens to him. Like he dies and then comes back looking like a Char clone or something? I truly don't know. RIP Mu I guess but not really. I've also been looking on Amazon for some gundams to start putting together over the summer. Seems like a me kind of hobby. I like seeing how things get put together and all (engineer moment), and I like studying action figures. Maybe it'll improve my craft. I'm probably going to start with RX-78 as he is the OG, and then I'll probably do Char's Zaku. Get the two classics down. I also might wanna do the Gouf (which is not apparently just a blue Zaku) and maybe the Lagowe from Seed. It looks like a fucked up cat and it makes me laugh. He's just a little guy. To be honest these guys are either far more expensive or far less expensive than what I tend to see with figurines. Like I'll see a $15 kit and be like "oh nice" and then see a $715 one and question my existence. The perfect grades (if that is what the highest one is I'm not googling that rn) scare me. I also haven't seen anything he's been in but I do have a favorite Gundam and it's Tequila Gundam. Yes he is a racial stereotype, but I'm part of that culture so it's fine. Specifically the Daniel custom. He's a giant Mexican robot cowboy. What more could I want in a Gundam?

Anywho, I found a trend where people put their Gundams on their bags with waterproof clear cases. The image of a Gouf just hanging off of a bag is so fucking funny to me. Clear prison for Gouf. Clear prison for Gouf for a thousand years. Maybe I get one and just carry my little soundwave around with me. Maybe I should make a page on here of the gundam I make and my action figures. That could be fun. I have some Star Wars action figures and my Soundwave as I mentioned. This is probably enough for tonight. I have to make a blinkie for the blog page and add it to the menu at some point, but I am not sure that is happening tongiht. Good night, y'all.